Before we led teams, gave feedback, or ran meetings, we learned to connect – often in the most personal way possible: as children. The parent-child relationship is one of our first laboratories for human connection.
It’s where we start to absorb the essential skills that shape how we show up in every relationship that follows – at home, at work, and beyond.
Connection fuels high-performing teams, unlocks inclusive cultures, and drives sustainable leadership. But it doesn’t appear out of nowhere – it’s built, modelled, and practiced. And for many of us, our first lessons in connection come from the adults who raised us.
Connection is a learned skill
Perhaps you have memories like these from childhood: moments when someone made eye contact to really see you. When they listened to your big emotions without flinching. When they taught you – through actions more than words – how to trust, communicate, and repair after conflict.
These are the seeds of empathy, emotional regulation, and mutual respect. They’re also the exact same skills we call on every day as professionals. Whether it’s navigating a challenging conversation, supporting a struggling teammate, or showing up with authenticity as a leader – these moments are built on the same connective muscle we started flexing early in life.
The ripple effect of early connection
The way we were taught to connect (or not) doesn’t just shape our childhoods. It echoes across our professional lives. Do we default to listening or problem-solving? Do we seek feedback or avoid conflict? Do we feel safe being vulnerable – or do we armour up?
Of course, everyone’s experience is different. Some of us learned connection through warm and steady presence. Others learned by contrast – by noticing what was missing and building those skills intentionally in adulthood. Either way, the impact is real, and it lasts.
What parents teach us about leadership
Parenting requires a long view. It demands patience, adaptability, and the ability to lead through uncertainty. It calls for emotional intelligence, boundary-setting, and a steady hand in the midst of chaos. Sound familiar?
Many of the same qualities that make someone a grounded, present parent also make them an exceptional leader. Not because they manage others, but because they understand people. Because they know connection isn’t a soft skill – it’s THE skill.
Personal growth fuels professional excellence
We often talk about leadership development and coaching as professional pursuits. But the truth is, the line between personal and professional growth is blurrier than we think. The self-awareness you gain as a caregiver, the resilience you build through sleepless nights, the ability to stay present during a meltdown (theirs or yours!) – these are the same capacities that strengthen workplace culture.
Coach individuals to lead with empathy, foster inclusion, and build meaningful relationships, because these are the drivers of success. And we start by recognising that everyone’s journey begins somewhere personal. Honouring that journey is how we create space for real transformation.
Final thought: honour the roots, grow the connection
Whether you’re a parent, a mentor, a leader – or all three – the skills you draw on each day are rooted in connection. And connection, like any muscle, grows stronger when we practice it with intention.
So this month, take a moment to reflect:
- Who helped you learn to connect?
- What lessons are you still carrying?
- And how can you keep building that foundation – for yourself, your team, and the next generation?
